The Dad Test ft. The Neu Dad

Sound the must-read feature klaxon! In a bid to assess the ‘dadliness’ of celebrity dads and popular dad bloggers, I’ve created a fun Q&A called the Dad Test. Stepping up to the plate in week nine: radio presenter, dad-of-one and popular dad blogger The Neu Dad.

“Testing, testing” – The Neu Dad in the studio with son Marley

Q1. Have you ever messed up a nappy change?

“I don’t think I have. I’ve been quite a lucky dad in that respect. Apart from the time Marley peed in my face, obviously.”
Dadliness rating: 0

Q2. Have you ever voluntarily chosen to watch a kid’s cartoon when your kid wasn’t there?

“Oh my god, all the time. It’s not good. My wife finds it unbelievable that I sometimes know which episode is on as soon as it starts. And I have an unhealthy fixation with Bing; he’s my nemesis.”
Dadliness rating: 1

Q3. Have you ever parented with a hangover?

“On many occasions. I remember coming back from one night out and the sleeping bag was already laid out on the sofa for me. The next day was not pleasant in any way.”
Dadliness rating: 1

Q4. Have you ever put off a DIY task for longer than three months?

“Yes. There’s a window missing from the garden shed. It’s been missing for almost a year. I bought some Perspex to fix it, but it was the wrong size. Hmm, thinking about that has just ruined my day.”
Dadliness rating: 1

Q5. Have you ever got stuck in the soft play?

“Not actually stuck, but one time I was a bit too ‘wide’ for the slide, which was quite humiliating.”
Dadliness rating: 0

Q6. Have you ever shouted “plane” in a public place only to turn around and realise that your kid isn’t there?

“Ha, not ‘plane’, but I did start singing a kid’s song in the supermarket one time. I was getting quite into it, then realised I was pushing a trolley and not my son’s buggy. He was at home.”
Dadliness rating: 1

The Neu Dad and his sidekick Marley

Q7. Have you ever done something wrong and not told your other half?

“I’ve been caught giving Marley snacks just before dinner and found myself in a lot of trouble. And I’ve done it other times and not been caught. Please don’t tell her.”
Dadliness rating: 1

Q8. Have you ever been injured in the line of dad duty?

“Does appendicitis count? I literally had surgery about six weeks ago. I think it would be harsh blaming my three-year-old for that one, though.”
Dadliness rating: 0

Q9. What’s your go-to dad outfit?

“Oh, good question. I have a T-shirt that was sent to me, which says ‘Fatherhood Club’ on it. I love bringing that one out. Match it with a pair of dad jeans, socks and sandals and you’re laughing!”
Dadliness rating: 1

Q10. What’s your favourite kid’s food snack?

“Party Rings. I buy them and don’t even tell Marley we have them. “
Dadliness rating: 1

Q11. Tell us your best dad joke

“Why did the scarecrow win the Nobel prize? He was out standing in his field!”
Dadliness rating: 1

Q12. Can you draw a dinosaur?

A dinosaur The Neu Dad had lying around

“We did this the other day.”

Father Hood says: An okay effort, but I want bespoke dinos rather than leftovers from a previous craft activity. Thus, I have no option but to award The Neu Dad a big, fat zero.
Dadliness rating: 0

Final ‘dadliness’ score

Supermarket singing, DIY avoidance and a weird fixation with Bing power popular dad blogger The Neu Dad to a commendable 8 points in the Dad Test. Check out his website and follow his social pages via the links below, and tune into Riverside Radio between 2pm and 3pm on a Sunday afternoon to hear his show.


The Dad Test leaderboard

Matt Coyne – A.K.A Man vs Baby 11
Dad Blog UK 9
Daddy Poppins 9
The Outdoor Dad 9
Yule Times 9
Diary of the Dad 8
DIY Daddy 8
Four Seasons Dad 8
The Neu Dad 8


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