Dad truths: the pain of being the less popular parent


I wrote the below on my Instagram this morning. It’s a bit of a rant, but it seemed to resonate with some other mums and dads, so I figured it was worth posting on the site. Hope you all enjoy it and take something from it.

As you can see from the above pics, my son and I have a pretty good relationship. He is a great little kid and I love him so much. Usually, this feeling is reciprocated, but when he is ill, only his mummy will do. Sounds like a pretty good deal, right? Wrong. If you have ever experienced this situation, then you will appreciate how hard it is for the non-favoured parent. This weekend, for example, my son came down with hand, foot and mouth. It’s a pretty nasty viral infection that left him in pain and, due to having ulcers in his mouth, unwilling to eat. It was difficult to see the little man in such a state, and to make matters worse he screamed the house down any time his mum put him down or went to the toilet.

A dad’s nightmare

I know what you’re thinking. ‘What a nightmare for her.’ And it is, but what about me? I mean, have you ever loved anyone unconditionally only for them to spend any period they are left alone with you holding their breath/hitting you/bellowing so loudly that I’m surprised the neighbours didn’t call the police? If you have, then you’ll know how utterly useless (and incredibly frustrated) I have felt every night this weekend – also please be aware that you are not alone or actually useless. If you haven’t, then I hope you never do.

@daddilife @thedadnetwork #parenting #parentingishard #instababy #baby #sleep #ukbloggers #dad #dadblogger #pblogger
P.S. Apologies for the rant, I’m knackered and the trains to work are screwed.
P.P.S Normal, pithy one-liner service will be resumed tomorrow.
P.P.P.S Look at that smile, what a kid.
P.P.P.P.S Dad out!


  1. One of the best parts of being s parent for me is watching the bond between my kids and my wife. Everyone is different and I am by no way saying you’re feelings aren’t valid, but it makes me feel so good to see my kids go to my wife for comfort when they are scared, sick of tired.

    • Hi Andrew, I totally agree with you. It’s amazing to see the bond my wife and son have developed. The bit I find tough is at night, when he’s sick and persistently screams in my ear whenever my wife leaves the room. I know he can’t understand, but I’m standing there, knackered and giving him everything, and nothing is working because all he is doing is bellowing for mummy. That’s the hard part. When your kid is in pain, and won’t let you help them, because they want someone else.

      • I completely understand. I feel like this is prep for life. There will be so many times throughout their lives where we’ll be begging them to let us help then (homework, relationships problems) and they just won’t let us. You’re kids are lucky though because you care so much and some day you’ll be their super dad and they’ll need you. Right now my social job is insect removal. “Papa a bug!”, they scream.

  2. Good points and thanks again for commenting. Hopefully it’ll be easier not being able to help them when they are older, because they will at least understand that were trying to help. Good luck with the bug removal

  3. Aww only a couple of hours ago we had a similar situation and I was moaning I wasn’t being left alone. I wasn’t really thinking about his feelings.. Cheers for the eye opener!

    • Thanks for the comment, and no problem at all. I completely understand why you would be like that (and am sure your partner does too), as it’s so tiring and tough having to deal with a crying baby all the time. But, yes, when the tears die down and you have a chance to draw breath please think about being rejected by your little one could make your other half feel. Hope you enjoyed the post.

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